I tell people to call Noname because I like that their not roles or expectations made by someone else that I have to fit. I go by fae/faer pronouns.
What does being non-binary mean to you?
To me non-binary mean no rules I have to follow. No predetermined roles I have to fit. No expectations. No part I’m force to play. I can simply be me and their no longer rules saying I’m being me wrong.
What are your thoughts on the concept of gender?
Gender is a social constructs. It’s made up to suit the needs of society. But gender identity is someone internal experience of gender and how they experience gender while in society.
Do you think society as a whole would function differently if no one was assigned a gender at birth?
Yes I do. People would just simply do what they want because they want to do it not because of rules that say their supposed to do it. It’s freedom it no rule it’s just simply living the way that make you happy.
Do you feel like you were misgendered at birth? What do you wish that you would have been gendered as?
Yes and I wish I wasn’t gendered as anything I just wish they told me that I was just me instead my agab and say to do whatever I wanted as long as it made me happy and didn’t harm anyone.
Do you consider yourself transgender?
Yes
Do you plan on transitioning in any way? Name change, pronouns, surgery etc…
Yes. I change my name and pronouns and I’m looking into possible routes into medical transitions.
What are your preferred pronouns and how did you decide?
Fae/faer and I just realized I vibes with them for a while.
How strict are you with making sure people use your preferred pronouns and how vital are they to easing dysphoria?
In the perfect world I wouldn’t get misgendered and I wouldn’t have to correct people. But sadly I still have to constantly remind people of my pronouns and educate them and hope they get it and I can’t get mad at them if they don’t understand because it’s not their fault no one teaches them about us even though it fucking hurts to be misgendered. It feels like my skin is getting tighter around my body to the point it’s going to start snapping my bones. But I’m not allowed to get mad about because it’s not their fault it’s society fault even though it fucking sucks their no place to put this anger. Very vital for easing gender dysphoria. I even let people call me they them to ease my dysphoria because with fae faer the give me euphoria but for they them I just know they acknowledge my existence and don’t feel any feeling of dysphoria and euphoria.
How soon after meeting someone do you explain your gender and ask them to use your preferred pronouns?
Once I found out their not transphobic so a couple weeks or when we’re in safe environment that won’t tolerate transphobia then immediately. Or whenever they bring it up for me.
What are your thoughts on dead naming?
Don’t do it. It fucking sucks to be dead name. I’m constantly being haunted by this version of me that they forced me ti play for years and I don’t want that name ti curse me until death.
What is your preferred honorific?
Person, human, anything. That’s a compliment
How would you describe your sexual orientation?
Fluid, free, independent. I don’t feel sexual attraction often but when I do it constantly changing who I am attracted too. Even when I don’t feel sexual attraction I still admire the Beirut and weirdness of the naked human body it honestly spectacular
Did understanding your gender change your understanding of your sexuality?
Yes I realize that their rules on how I should be don’t matter and just do what you want to do and remember how humanity experiences love is infinite.
Are you monogamous or non-monogamous?
I don’t really want a realationship I settle for some best buds.
What is your gender expression?
Whatever I want. I do prefer to look fem but I’m ray presented the opportunity to so safely. So what ever fits and comfortable or make me look ethereal
Do you feel dysphoria? What is dysphoria like for you?
Yes I do. Dysphoria is like you body is a cage. Your trapped in other peoples idea of you. Your never truly allowed to be yourself or choose who you want to be in that cage.
How often do you have doubts about your gender identity?
I had doubts in a while
How did you first discover non-binary?
Gay tik tok
How did you come to realise that you were non-binary?
Their were no rules saying I was being me wrong. It could free me from the cage and let me finally have a choice in who I am.
How did it change how you lived your life, if it did at all?
I started or live my life how I wanted instead of how others wanted me to live my life.
How long have you identified as non-binary?
3 years
Have societal pressures ever made you question/suppress your non-binary identity?
Yes of course.
Why do you think it’s difficult for some people to grasp the concept of non-binary?
Their trapped in the cage stuck in a system that made to divide and control them
How did you start to come to terms with your non-binary identity?
I could finally be who I wanted to be. Their was no longer a wrong way to be me
What was the moment where you fully came to terms with your non-binary identity?
When I realize I didn’t fit into any of the roles I was forced in
Has your understanding of non-binary shifted since you first learned about it?
It not a third option. It’s freedom and their no rules telling us that we’re doing it wrong.
What are things about non-binary you wish people understood better?
You don’t have the right to determine if I’m living my life wrong. If you can’t comprehend that leave me alone. It’s my name, my pronouns, my gender, and my life. If you can’t handle that literally just leave and save us both some new trauma.
Have you come out as non-binary? If yes, how did you come out?
Yes I live how I wanted to people started to ask questions and I answered honestly
How did you decide who to tell and who do you tell now when meeting new people?
Listen carefully to their political beliefs and if their right wing usual bad sign. I just usually live how I want and if people ask questions answer honestly if they mean no harm in it. Or tell them when it directly affects my mental well-being
How did people react to your coming out?
Usually surprise. They knew I was fruity but not this fruity
What’s something you wish you had known about non-binary before coming out ?
No rules just do what make you happy
What’s the hardest part about coming out?
Having to explain it over and over again
What is dating and finding a romantic partner like?
I don’t know really feel romantic attraction
What are your thoughts on dating apps?
Never tried
How has identifying as non-binary affected your relationships?
Some people are just shitty. The best thing you can do is let them go.
What is it like filling legal forms about gender?
Hard
How does your gender identity affect legal documents like your I.D?
Idk it’s hard to navigate
What is it like using public restrooms?
Harrowing and better with music
Does sexism affect your life in any way?
Yes
What are your thoughts on having kids? Do you plan to have kids someday?
Kids are terrifying why would I want to put more on this earth. I rather not put them though the trauma of existing in modern society.
If you were to have kids someday, what would you like them to refer you as?
Aunty or uncle or the fun one or the weird one
What are your thoughts on skoliosexuality (attraction to any gender or nongender that isn’t cisgender)?
Depends if it’s a cis person fetishizing trans poeple. Do they like the person or do they like the stereotypes surrounding that person
Do you consider yourself to be part of the LGBTQIA+ community?
Yes
Do you identify as queer? If not, how do you identify?
Yes
Are you religious? If so, how does your faith and queerness work together?
No
How do you think your experiences through life may or may not have influenced/shaped your non-binary identity?
I have more freedom in choice than other. I do what makes me happy
How do you feel about how non-binary is perceived in the LGBTQIA+ community?
Cis people are weird and always seem to be shocked about my existence
Have you experienced discrimination in the LGBTQIA+ community?
Yes some transphobia/aphobia with a little bit of ableism
What bothers you in the LGBTQIA+ community?
I hate when people try to make rules on how someone should live.
Have you ever been to a pride parade? How did it go?
Yes and it went great I met some great people
Do you agree that pride month is necessary?
Yes pride moth
What are your thoughts about “ally” being added to the LGBTQIA+ acronym?
You already have societal privilege you don’t need to be in the acronym to feel special
What are your thoughts on labels?
Can work for some but can also be restricting
How has having the non-binary label benefited you?
No rules I can be whoever I want
How do you feel about representation of non-binary in media?
Lacking. I don’t really vibe with most of them that much
What would you like to say to people who question non-binary as a gender identity?
Leave me alone and just let people do what they want it dosnt affect you
Do you think that some of the misconceptions come from the idea that gender and sex are the same thing?
Yes
A kid asks if you are a boy or a girl, respond.
No. In just simply who I am
How do you deal with people who are curious about your non-binary identity?
Google it I’m tired
How do you deal with unfair/mean comments?
Ignore
What was the most difficult moment in your life surrounding being non-binary?
Seeing people on tv wishing I’m dead or being forced to educate people about my existence both outside and inside the classroom
What non-binary stereotypes do you not relate to?
Not being human
What non-binary stereotypes do you relate to?
Being chaotic
What are the most annoying things people have said to you about being non-binary?
Asking the same questions over and over and being forced to answer them all the time
What are misconceptions about being non-binary?
That we dot exist and that we’re not human or fakers
What are things to NOT say to a non-binary person?
That we don’t exist
What questions do you wish people would stop asking you?
If I exist or if I deserve to exist
What would you like to say to anyone who is non-binary or wondering if they are?
Good luck. Just do what you want and you will even gaily figure it out
How involved would you say you are with the non-binary community?
I tend to keep by myself
What are things you love about being non-binary, or being part of the non-binary community?
No rules about who I am suppose to be. No one saying that I’m being me wrong
What are things that most non-binary people can relate to?
Not fitting in
How often do you meet other non-binary people?
Fairly often
How do you recognise other non-binary people irl?
You ask
How do you meet and connect with fellow non-binary people?
You talk to them and go to queer events
Do you think sexuality , romantic attraction and gender identity are things that people are born with, influenced by upbringing, or both?
Both it’s all very complicated so just do whatever you vibe with in the moment
What’s it like being queer in your country/society?
Scary
How have you been subjected to queerphobia?
Yes
What would you like to say to queerphobic people?
Leave me alone and mind your own business
What would you like people to know about non-binary?
If it doesn’t concern your well-being leave me alone
How can people be better allies to non binary people?
Let us do what we want and educate yourself about gender instead of just using us as your only resource
What are your favorite non-binary quotes?
Do what you want were all going to be dead soon and what we did wouldn’t matter any more
What are some of your favorite pieces of media with authentic representation everyone should watch?
Heart break high. Owl house, OneTopicAtATime
Who are your favorite non-binary celebrities or characters?
Nikignik and diggory graces from hello form the hallowoods
What are your thoughts on queer-baiting?
It’s annoying and something people constantly misunderstand
Give a message to the queer community
The world would be a much better place if people mind their own business. Also have fun do what you want it’s not going to matter in a few years so you might as well do it now before we’re all dead